The rain was pouring down today. Good. It haven’t been raining that much lately actually. Ok, maybe some yesterday and some the day before that. But not very much.
Yesterday my head was full of Chromebook, so there was no time left for photography. I mostly missed the rain. I had motivation for rain.
You must think – what’s wrong with me? Well, almost every shot I’ve made so far have been made in sunlight, or under a muddy grey sky at worst. I feel a need for a different view. Rain would be a nice companion and mood to be in.
Muddy was how I felt today. Almost like a hangover, but without the headache, fortunately. Still very off.
Yesterday I was awake to late and woke up to early. I’m actually on a short vacation this week. Doing nothing special at all but just because I can. However, I couldn’t re-sleep even if I felt not done yet.
Time actually doesn’t matter that much right now. Good for me.
During spring and summer and some time past into autumn, we almost always sleep with the window open in our bedroom. I love the sound of pouring rain and dripping drops. It’s mindful and reminds me of camping.
Rain kind of slows down the speed of life and makes you more sensitive to your own thoughts and feelings. My mind felt a balanced connection with the rain today.
But where is the rain? Do you see any rain on my photos? No, me neither.
I made myself prepared and then it suddenly disappeared when I walked to the bus. Even the clouds partly disappeared and the sun started to shine through. My sleepy brain started to feel numb and lost.
Where is my rain? I really needed that rain. The rain made me feel in harmony. This felt like a collision, smashing my head into the pavement. Suddenly the world became same as it ever was. I wanted it to be not the same as it ever is.
My motivation dropped, so I tried to create new connections with the world to make it fit my mind. It drained a lot of energy out of me to empower my inspiration. So I got really fucked up in my head and felt like a black hole at the end.
Back home I closed down the system and fell to sleep and dreamed about colourful horses who shouted – HeellooO! just like agent Cooper. Then everything was much better.