I felt a bit anti social today. No attraction what so ever to hit the big rivers of bodies. And oh my so many there was of them out there today. Crazy
I already knew when I got onto the bus that I probably wouldn’t do my ordinary walkabout today. My intuition told me so. I made a try at the end of the trip and got fucked up in my head almost immediately. Sorry, but you fit better at distance in my world today.
I went backstage instead. Walked along the roads and pathways between the buildings in other directions. Places where I probably once in a lifetime have been before but don’t remember.
I used to live and be here and around occasionally once upon a time. A strange mixed feeling. But I think I kind of like it better now when I have distance to the crazy chaos of happiness, melancholy and depression back in the eighties. Today those memories of my life feels unreal, more like a strange movie.
Good and bad side by side instantly, live fast and die young – life is a crazy party and then you die. My future was no further away then the next second.
But I don’t regret a second. Not even things I regret and could have done different. After all, everything happens for a reason – the making of who you are.
I really enjoyed my walk in silence today. Watching people at distance, like a shadow of my past, a nostalgic ghost in the sunlight of the future.
So simple, yet so powerful way to achieve satisfaction. Just walking around with my camera catching moments of life through my mood of mind. No expectations whatsoever, no searching, no waiting, just feel and snap a shot along my way whenever my intuition told me to.
But along my way I eventually happened to walk upon one and later on a second person I wanted to make a street portrait of. They just was there in my way to be made.
The highlight of the day was probably my ego floating above my body and this woman who really liked being photographed and began to pose for me. Unfortunately I’m not very comfortable in this game play. I could probably go on shooting loads. She seemed to have no problems letting me do it. But I just made some few.
A lovely day backstage. For sure something I’ll do more of in the future. It felt so much more giving than bathing in the crowds collecting people on my memory card.